06.27.07
Musical funnies
In the spirit of my upcoming workshop, herewith some of the musical jokes I’ve accumulated over the years:
A guitarist is auditioning for James Brown’s band. JB asks, “Can you play an E ninth chord?” The guitarist says, “Sure.” JB asks, “Can you play it all night?”
A musician gets a call from his wife on his cell phone in the middle of a tune at a gig. He says, “Honey, can you call me back in about two minutes? The bass player will be starting his solo.”
A band is playing a wedding reception. The groom’s uncle, three sheets to the wind, stumbles onstage and says, with maximum slur, “I f—in’ wanna shing f—in’ Missshhty!” The bandleader, a bit taken aback by the guy’s raw language, nonetheless says, “Okay.” Uncle Sol says, “And I f—in’ wanna shing it in f—in’ 5/4 time!” The bandleader cocks his eyebrow, turns to the others and says, “Can you guys play Misty in five-four time?” They agree to give it a shot. Uncle Sol counts it off and starts singing: “One, two, three, four, five, Look at f—in’ me . . . ”
Know how to get a guitarist in Nashville, Tennessee off your front porch? Pay him for the pizza.
